The Milwaukee Brewers distributed a “press release” before tonight’s game, purportedly issued by the Chicago Cubs regarding a new book by General Manager Jim Hendry.
Under a headline that said “A new book certain to be a best seller” was the fake book title: “How to Finish Near Last Place with the Highest Payroll in the League.”
The release said: “Read in Jim Hendry’s own words how the Chicago Cubs managed to finish near the bottom of the National League Central; Division with the highest payroll in the National League.”
It also said the chapters included:
“Why I signed Milton Bradley!”
“Why I released Casey McGehee only to see him hit 20 home runs and drive in nearly 100 runs for a division rival!”
“Why I hired former Pittsburgh general manager Dave Littlefield, the man who helped make the Pirates what they are today, as my special assistant!”
“How I botched the recall of Micah Hoffpauir from our minor league team in Iow by losing track of the number of days that he was in the minors!”
“Why I signed players to long-term contracts with limited trade options!”
The release ended with the sentence: “Reserve your copy today!” Chicago Breaking Sports.
That is totally shameful, and there is clearly no truth behind that humor. *stoic ninja face emoticon*