Do you know what Certain Dri is?

It’s a doctor-recommended, highly-powerful antiperspirant for people with “excessive underarm sweating.” That’s fine. It seems like a useful enough product.

You know what’s not fine? Certain Dri has over 9700 fans on Facebook. Bleacher Nation has just 1033.

Look, I appreciate the virtues of a dry armpit as much as the next guy, but the idea that some eight *thousand* more people like Certain Dri than Bleacher Nation – much less like their antiperspirant so much more than Bleacher Nation that they’ll gladly broadcast that fact to their family and friends on the Internet – is gnawing at me. It’s crushing my soul.

I won’t stand for it.

So, I’m telling you: “like” Bleacher Nation on Facebook. Do it here. As we enter the hottest rumor season of the year, it’s a great way to get all of the latest Chicago Cubs rumors thrown right into your Facebook feed.

And let’s be real – learning that the Red Sox are talking to the Cubs about Matt Garza is a hell of a lot more interesting than your brother’s girlfriend’s photos of her new dog.

  • VanSlaw

    You had me at Certain Dri.

  • Fishin Phil

    If it makes you feel any better, only 51 people like Depends Adult Diapers.

    • Brett

      You know, it does make me feel better. What about “Oops I Crapped My Pants”?

  • Jeff

    I don’t use Facebook anymore, but I do follow you on twitter. You outnumber Certain-dri on twitter, 7000 to 200, so don’t feel so bad. Facebook is a dying platform.

    • Brett

      Do you really think Facebook is dying? Do you think that because of Google+, or just fading interest? I look around at my friends, and I have a hard time seeing Facebook going anywhere any time soon.

      • Jeff

        Over 6 million Americans closed their facebook accounts in May and the reports are that the June numbers are not much better. I’m not saying people don’t still use it, but it’s not as widespread or “must-see” as it was before. The instant gratification nature of our society is leading more people to twitter. I’m sure FB will go on for all it’s worth, but it’s not the be all end all of social networking it was even last year.

        • Brett

          Obviously I love Twitter (and it has been far kinder to me than Facebook), but it’s still got just 1/6 the users in the US as does Facebook. I like them both, myself, but it will be interesting to see how things continue to evolve over the next year or two.

  • hardtop

    I would befriend you Brett, but I refuse to use it. I’m a purist, and therefore only communicate anonymously via blog comments.

    I’m flying home to Chicago tomorrow morning and would “friend” some of you fellow sickos in person, but alas, too many damn family members to parade my daughter around to. I will be at the Marlins game on Friday, my daughter’s first trip to the holy land.
    Ill by the long haired tattooed guy holding a bleacher nation sign 😉

    hilarious post by the way.

    • Brett

      Thanks, HT. You’ve already given me too many details – I will find you.