Just as we take joy in the foibles of the St. Louis Cardinals (“Scardenfreude”), I’d say it’s fair to also enjoy the misadventures of the ever-floundering Chicago White Sox.

To wit:

A Chicago man was arrested Monday for allegedly breaking into Chicago White Sox general manager Kenny Williams’ house.

Wayne L. Field III, 51, of the 900 block of West Lawrence Avenue was charged with residential burglary for allegedly unlawfully entering the house and taking several articles of clothing, a set of keys and jewelry.

Field apparently made himself at home. Police found him wearing Williams’ clothes and the GM’s 2005 World Series ring. He also apparently defrosted a lobster.

This incident occurred between Nov. 18 and 21 while Williams was out of town, police said.

Williams confirmed the incident and said the man drank his beer, ate frozen pizza, surfed the internet and kicked his shoes off on the bed. NBC Chicago.

Thankfully – and I mean that genuinely – the burglar was caught, and no serious harm occurred. But, since no serious harm occurred, I reckon it’s fair to chuckle about it now.

I can see Mr. Field now, strolling around Williams’ house, dressed to the nines…

“I’m Kenny Williams. I used to be thought of as a visionary, but now I hire guys with no experience to important positions. No matter. I’ll kick off my shoes and eat some lobster and stare at my 2005 World Series ring. I wonder what Jake Peavy is up to tonight? I should give him a call.”

  • Bails17

    Classic!!!  Also…on the phone with his new Manager….”Hey Robin, I just ordered Managing in the Big Leagues 101 for Dummies.  Why don’t you come over for a few brews and a snack and we’ll dive in!”

  • JulioZuleta

    Until I looked back and saw the date, I thought we had an explanation for the Ventura hiring. Burgalr finds Williams cell phone, find the first name he recognizes, “Hey look, Robin Ventura, I’ll call him adn offer him the job as manager…this is gonna be hilarious”. Then Kenny didn’t have the heart to tell him it was a prank call from a burglar.

  • MC2

    He almost got away with it to, until he tried to sign Adam Dunn to a contract extension!

  • oswego chris

    If I got to be Kenny Williams for a day, I would do what he does and draft my sons onto my major league team (regardless of their talent)…of course my son is only 6…

    seriously one of Kenny’s kids(I am not sure if it was the one who broke into a car) played in our conference…nice player…good player…not an MLB player…yet the Sox drafted him..

    • Bails17

      Stuff like that happens all the time Chris. I played ball with Matt Boone (The youngest of the Boone brothers) and he had NO business playing pro ball.

      I just looked him up and his numbers were just as bad as I remember….243 lifetime BA….649 lifetime .OPS….but here is the real tell tail sign: .888 lifetime fielding percentage. This is 7 years of Rookie/A ball. Not a great career!! But…he got the chance none the less.

  • Cliffy

    QT @SDUNSTONJR: Wow timing is everything! That’s so true! I’m really happy about my decision!

  • Steve

    Speaking of no experience…who’s managing the Cubs this year? Oh yeah. I will say what I said when a lot of posters hoped the Cardinals would sign Albert, and be saddled with financial constraints for years to come: worry about your own team. For a franchise that hasn’t won in over a hundred years, Cub fan sure to a lot of rubber-necking, when it comes to other team’s issues. Dale hasn’t ever made an opening day lineup card…the same as Ventura. In my mind, the only difference is, Robin will be making his lineup for a team that won a World Series six years ago…

    • http://www.bleachernation.com Brett

      The suggestion that Ventura and Sveum have the same level of relevant experience when it comes to managing is not really worth a discussion.

      And, in case you haven’t noticed: rubbernecking is all we have right now. So, I’ll gladly keep staring at the train wreck across town.

    • JasonB

      “I will say what I said when a lot of posters hoped the Cardinals would sign Albert, and be saddled with financial constraints for years to come: worry about your own team”

      Good advice – now why don’t you follow it?

    • Alex

      “In my mind, the only difference is, Robin will be making his lineup for a team that won a World Series six years ago…”

      Yeah.. A lineup that includes Dunn, Rios and Beckham.. Good luck with that..

      So I guess in your mind, the Sox should automatically be in the 2012 playoffs based on winning a World Series 6 years ago. Just another example of Southside math.

  • Steve

    You’re right. New owner, new President, new GM, new manager, large roster turnover this winter…nothing to pay attention to. I wonder how, say, the Brave’s AA team is doing?

    • http://www.calliopevoices.com EtotheR

      I especially liked the part where you listed all the things we’ve been wanting for years, and pretended it was a negative…

      It’s called a “regime change”. The Cubs didn’t just replace a manager with a candidate who appealed to the GM’s gut instinct. We’ve already done that…

      By the way…I did a bunch of other stuff while I was in Kenny’s house:

      1) Rubbed my ass on all his dishes.

      2) Started a fire in the garbage can, and made steam clouds by peeing on it.

      3) Started a fire in the fireplace, and put it out with the fish tank.

      4) Opened every book in the place, and signed a heartfelt dedication from Mr. Glen Campbell.

      5) Threw all his eggs on the floor, and made him a shopping list that didn’t include eggs.

      6) Left his “Grandma Got Runover By a Reindeer” CD on a continuous loop.

      7) Called Robin Ventura, and left him a voicemail that said “Psych!”

      8 ) Looked his cat in the eye, and called him a mass of unprintable names.

      9) Refilled his ice trays…with urine.

      10) Took a dump in his sink, and named it Larry.

      • http://www.bleachernation.com Brett


        • http://www.calliopevoices.com EtotheR

          Don’t force it…gotta keep it organic, or I’ll never learn.

  • Steve

    Well, yousir, missed both my point, and my sarcasm. Of course all of the recent changes are positives; all very worthy of attention. Perhaps, these positives could steal a little attention from stories about the burglary of Kenny Williams home…on a Cubs blog site. This site is becoming more of a “cut and paste” blog all the time…a collection of cliff notes from other sources, placed neatly, “just in case you haven’t read the paper or been to ESPN.COM yet”. Along with the usual sidebar of “(as I said previously)”, and some random ego-scratching/self-serving dribble. Things have gotten very stale at BN. I can get any, and all of the information provided here, from it’s original source. I can use MLB.com, Cubs.com, the Trib, SI.com, etc.. Enjoy bashing the Whitesox, and Cardinals. Don’t forget there’s real baseball news going on…outside of a break-in at a rival GM’s house. I’m done coming to a site…just to click on a link to get the news. Enjoy your BN t-shirts, folks…

    • http://www.bleachernation.com Brett

      Aggregating news and rumors from all over the ‘net, and adding my own commentary and analysis is a big part of what this site is. Always has been. So, your criticism is, like, um, the point.

      And, forgive me, but it’s ironic that you posted that not 40 minutes after the site broke its own rumor about Soto and Marmol (two days after breaking a Garza rumor (which was then reported by Ken Rosenthal), and two weeks after breaking a Cespedes rumor (which was then reported everywhere)). Aw, fiddle sticks – now I’m just being self-serving. I guess I can’t prove you wrong.

      Thanks for stopping by.

      • Ron Swanson

        You’re doing great, Brett. Don’t listen to the haters.

        You add a lot of great analysis to the “cut and pasting” and you’re usually spot on. Besides, I like not having to click all over the web for my Cubs fix.

        • http://www.calliopevoices.com EtotheR

          Yeah…I like Brett.

          He soft and cuddly…and almost housebroken.

          • http://www.bleachernation.com Brett

            If you’d stop putting that bullseye on the carpet, I could control myself.

            • http://www.calliopevoices.com EtotheR

              Dealbreaker. That’s where I shoot marbles.

      • JulioZuleta

        I wish more White Sox fans would spend their time looking for jobs rather than bashing the Cubs on its websites. Could be worse I suppose, he isn’t committing a crime…

        • Sweetjamesjones

          Typical White Sox fans.

          Haters gonna hate.

          Always one person that has to rain on this website’s parade. I guess Steve just misses the point and feels like being a typical dick on the internet.

          Lord forbid that we have a place where Cubs fans can get together and talk about issues surrounding the Cubs.

          Lord forbid Brett “copy and paste” news stories and add some of his humor and commentary to it.

          “I can get any information from blah blah blah,” Yeah you can. I do the same, just like everyone on this website. But i guess you missed the point of Bleachernation as I feel thats its a cool community for us to talk about the Cubs.

          This will be the only time I really ever say something like this, but Steve you can go fuck yourself.


  • Steve

    Well, James…you are both foul-mouthed, and apparently, can’t gather from my post that I am a Cubs fan. I have been visiting this site for quite some time. I thought that was quite obvious. I’m sure you would have picked up on those facts, if you weren’t in such a hurry to run to the defense of this site’s defence. It’s called constructive criticism. I didn’t swear, or get personal with Bret. I have found the site moving in a bad direction. Lots of filler, not as much substance, and stories that don’t apply to the Cubs directly. And to Bret, I read stories on two of your “exclusives” days before I saw them here. So…I’m not sure what credit you have legitimately awarded yourself. I would, however, like to recognize the fact that your reply post was in good taste. Hopefully, your readers will follow your lead. Mine is only one opinion. Hopefully, you can get back to the type of site I once enjoyed, and found informative. If not, your audience apparently is pleased with things as they are. Good luck to you. And James, hopefully maturity finds you some day.

    • http://www.bleachernation.com Brett

      “I read stories on two of your “exclusives” days before I saw them here.”

      I should stop engaging, because little good can come from it, but … if you’ve got links, post ’em.

      Your thoughts on the site becoming a bunch of filler are accepted, and I disagree. You chose the most filler-y type post on which to comment (and the only one in the last, what, 50 that has a copy and paste?), which is telling. And the post, itself, is a joke – one I stand behind.

      I’d love for you to select a handful of a last dozen or so posts that you consider filler. I don’t see them, but maybe I’m biased. I write about what interests me as a Cubs fan, so, I guess, by definition, I don’t consider any of it filler. There’s a lot more content now than there was a year ago, but that’s because I have more time to cover all of the things I want to cover.

      I don’t mean to sound petty – it’s just that, despite there being five to six new posts every single day (and two or three each weekend day), I don’t see anything I don’t stand behind as useful, informative, interesting, compelling, or funny. They all have “substance,” and much of what you’ve said can’t be called “constructive criticism.” This is what I do for a living, and I work very, very hard at it. You’d have to know that your statements, by definition, are insulting, right?

      I can’t – and won’t try to – convince you to stay. But I have to stand up for what I do. I’m proud of what I do. It’s not easy, and I think it provides value to Cubs fans – even more now than it did in the past.

    • Sweetjamesjones


      God you sound like a music snob who hears a cool band before anyone and now that they became mainstream they are now “lame.”

      Constructive criticism? Far from it, you are nit-picking for nit-pickings sake.

      One day I hope you find true happiness and grow a tough skin because your “Debbie Downer” act reeks of typical internet trolling.

      And, Steve get a sense of humor and find some friends.

  • bhannon

    Well at least we all have now met diehards brother-in-law…i’d like everyone to welcome another pessimistic person that disagrees with everyone and everything on the site…yet finds time to comment on “irrelevant topics” and continue a discussion. P.s. just out of curiousity your point about ventura managing a team that won a world series means what exactly…and him coachin at a high school is the same thing as being a hitting coach for a team that went to the nlcs? makes tons of sense to me haha


    p.s. brett-don’t waste your breath this is the best all-inclusive cubs site on the web and i enjoy the daily posts!