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The All "He Was a Cub?" Team


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#1 Rated Rookie

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Posted 29 August 2012 - 03:36 PM

An All Star Team dedicated to notable players who played less than one forgettable season for the Cubs, and many forget that they ever were Cubs. Jim Edmonds and Kenny Lofton are left out, because their time with the Cubs was very memorable.

1B. Phil Nevin (2006): last ditch effort to save the 2006 season after the D Lee injury. Fucking Furcal. Actually posted a solid line of .274/.335/.497 in his time as a Cub, but this was 2006, and he was traded to the Twins in August.
2B. Lenny Harris (2003)-not a true 2B, but I can't find one, so why not the consummate journemyan?
SS. Rey Ordonez (2004): Cubs needed a Short Stop because someone was injured, and we had yet to acquire Nomar
3B: Corey Koskie (2009) never made it past spring training, but was a very productive player in his day.
LF: Ben Grieve (2004-2005): Played part of 2 seasons, but only a cumulative 38 games and 36 at bats, many, many years after being an Oakland A's mega prospect turned rookie of the year turned forgettable 4th outfielder.
CF: Marquis Grissom (2006) Another sprig training invitee who didn't quite make it. He actually called it quits before being cut.
RF: Matt Lawton (2005) Remember Matt Lawton's time with the Cubs in 2005? Me neither, but it happened in July of 2005. In August of 2005, he was then dispatched to the Yankees for minor league reliever Justin Berg, who's still floatng around the Cubs farm system after a few forgettable big league stints.
C. Jason Kendall (2008) Top prospect Geovany Soto was doing very well , but Ole Jim Hendry opted to go for the gritty, tough as nails veteran who ate nails for breakfast, shat them out, and ate them again.
DH (yes, we have a DH) Craig Monroe (2007) In August of 2007, Sweet Lou wanted another big bat for the home stretch. Instead, he got Craig Monroe.
SP: Doug Davis (2011) Remember that one start in which Davis shut down the Yankees? I do. Remember Doug Davis' other 8 starts? I don't.
CL: Manny Corpas (2012) One of the many unemployed veterans scraped off the pavement by Jed and Theo this past spring, Corpas was one of the few who actually made the big league roster. While he is still a member of the team, he's already fading from memory.

#2 Brett

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Posted 29 August 2012 - 05:19 PM

Hilarious and awesome.

#3 Carew

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Posted 29 August 2012 - 07:24 PM

The best description of Jason Kendall ever

#4 rcleven

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Posted 29 August 2012 - 09:45 PM

Just shook my head and laughed till I cried.
Oh so true.

#5 fromthemitten

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Posted 29 August 2012 - 11:27 PM

and Tony LaRussa can be the backup utility infielder. He appeared as a pinch runner in a game in '73 and it wound up being his last appearance as a player in the majors

#6 Fishin Phil

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 04:34 AM

I hated Jason Kendall. When he was with the Pirates, he was a bonafide Cub Killer. When he was with the Cubs, he was an automatic out.

Did I mention I hated Jason Kendall????
Please don't feed the psychos.

#7 fromthemitten

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 08:09 AM

He actually played slightly below his career line

and SCRAPPY

he brought SCRAP to the team

though if you remove the S from that term you got a good description of his defense

#8 Spriggs

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 08:34 AM

Hilarious stuff!!! The Nevin thing seems like it could have been 20 years ago instead of 6.

So many similar Cubs lists could be made.




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