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Cubs to Acquire Price, Longoria from Rays for Purple Monkey Banana Fish

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6 replies to this topic

#1 Oswego Chris

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Posted 16 December 2012 - 09:43 AM

***Oswego Chris was a frequent BN poster who has been M.I.A. for the last 5 months...his whereabouts will be explained soon...and yes...many of you are saying..."Who the Hell cares?"***

Okay. Now that I have your attention with that bogus Cubs' trade headline(sorry, that was cruel), let me explain. A pattern has developed since the trade deadline that has many a Cubs' fan befuddled:

1.Cubs acquire Randall Delgado from Braves for Ryan Dempster...Wait, not so fast...Dempster says no thanks

2. Cubs acquire Dan Haren from Angels for Carlos Marmol...Oops, Cubs don't like the crankiness in Haren's elbow, or shoulder...or both

3. Cubs sign Anibal Sanchez for 5 years and 75 million...agent calls Tiger's bluff, Sanchez signs with Detroit

All of the above were reported as fact...at least by one source...and we Cubs' fans were reacting with glee! Then, in each case, the proverbial other shoe dropped and the deal was yanked away from us like a 2003 World Series appearance. Some are now questioning if the Jedstein duo is at fault...as if Jed and Theo are to blame.


I am also not going to cast blame on the Twitter, Facebookies, or even Skypers...this new phenomena is just a by-product of the unprecedented media age we live in coupled with a fandom constantly looking for any positive news to suck up. Why, I have even heard stories of lawyers giving up their lucrative jobs to start Cubs' blogs! There is a huge demand for any Cubs' news, and there has never been so many people supplying it.

What this has created(to finally explain my title... Purple Monkey etc) is something equivalent to the old telephone game. There are just too many sources over too many forms trying to break the news...or leak it...that Cubs' news now needs to be taken with a grain of salt until it is officially official...then I would still wait a day or two until I get excited about it just to be safe.( Of course if Brett reports it is done, you know it is rock solid)

I am not complaining about this, you youngsters out there don't know how lucky you are! I would have to wait to hear Cubs' news on the radio(that thing in your car below where you plug your IPod in)...or call this thing called Sports phone during the winter meetings...at like .75 cents a call(then hope my mom didn't notice it on the phone bill).

So don't be upset and blame anyone, just be thankful you can get a Cubs fix every day all year...you just might get disappointed now and then.

You should be used to that.

#2 CubChymyst


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Posted 16 December 2012 - 08:52 PM

Completely agree with you, and this is not just a Cub only phenomenon. There have been other deals that have been reported and delayed due to physicals or feel through later. Brett, does a great job making sure everyone knows things are when rumors first appear that nothing is official yet or when things are done pending a physical. Having a site like this that wraps up all cubs rumors in one place is great and as many people have stated before thanks Brett

#3 cjdubbya


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Posted 17 December 2012 - 04:52 AM

I guess I'd reference the Mike Napoli deal. It's been "done" for about two weeks, but we still haven't seen the presser where he holds up his shiny new Red Sox jersey. It's the beauty and the curse of the new age of information. Ten to 20 years ago, all we'd hear is that Anibal Sanchez re-signed with the Tigers at five years and $80MM. No word that the Cubs had a deal done, probably not that there was even a rumor that the Cubs were linked to him.

#4 Cubbie Blues

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Posted 17 December 2012 - 07:27 AM

Welcome back Chris. We are all looking forward to all the 3rd world jail stories you will have for us. That's the only reason I can think of that you would be gone for so long. Any who, nice write-up. I know I for one got pretty worked up when I first saw that it was a done deal. After I heard the Tiger's where still in it is when my heart sank back down to the doldrums of the Cubs abyss. After all, what else was going to happen ... I blame Hendry.

"It's not the dress that makes you look fat, it's the fat that makes you look fat." - Al Bundy


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#5 Fishin Phil

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Posted 17 December 2012 - 07:42 AM

I for one will be sad to see Purple Monkey Banana Fish leave. He was Uber Scrappy!
Please don't feed the psychos.

#6 Stinky Pete

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Posted 17 December 2012 - 08:12 AM

I wasn't fooled. I knew right away the trade wasn't real. TB already has a purple monkey banana fish better than ours. Why would they trade for one? Why would make such a stupid suggestion? Why would anyone SAY SUCH A HORRIBLE HORRIBLE THING? I CAN'T BELIEVE ANYONE WOULD EITHER HATE THE CUBS THAT MUCH OR BE SO SPECTACULARLY DUMB THAT YOU THINK THIS TRADE COULD HAPPEN AND HELP THE CUBS!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!


Hey, good to see you back, Chris!

#7 Spriggs


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Posted 17 December 2012 - 08:20 AM

I for one will be sad to see Purple Monkey Banana Fish leave. He was Uber Scrappy!

I'm so relieved this is only a joke. I was really going to be pissed.

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