The Littlest Girl decided to feed me some Cheerios this morning, which was hilarious and awesome and sweet. The only catch? One of the Cheerios she fed me had been stashed away in her mouth for an undetermined length of time before she retrieved its squishy remains and thrust it into my mouth. VIVA PARENTHOOD!
- If you missed it overnight, Troy Tulowitzki did not choose the Cubs, and instead is headed to the Yankees. It’s hard to be TOO upset about missing out on a total flyer with very low odds of a meaningful contribution, but the fit was just right for the Cubs, and it also would have provided additional cover for the team to deal Addison Russell. Alas.
- One of the best articles of the year every year, as Jayson Stark looks at the strange but true feats of the 2018 season:
So what was so Strange But True about 2018?
A guy got hurt taking off his pants!.Another debuted before his debut!.And you might have heard there was a World Series game that lasted longer than a flight to London!
It’s the Strange But True Feats of 2018! https://t.co/dJDL4ekThX
— Jayson Stark (@jaysonst) December 31, 2018
- The literal first thing mentioned in the entire column? “So what was so Strange But True about baseball in the year 2018? Well, a guy got hurt taking off his pants!” Yeah, that’d be Cubs closer Brandon Morrow.
- The other Cubs mention in the piece was this … balk?
Folty Spit Balk.
— Rob Friedman (@PitchingNinja) August 31, 2018
- The Cubs didn’t really have a ton of can-you-believe-that-happened weirdness this year, but I think David Bote’s two-out, two-strike, pinch-hit, down-three, walk-off grand slam coulda been in there. As near as I can find, that is the first time that particular group of bits has happened in the last 40 years (there were six pinch-hit, down-three, walk-off grand slams before Bote, but the ones before 1979, I can’t determine if they were with two outs AND two strikes). So it was extremely historic, and possibly the first ever.
- Among my favorites in the Stark piece full of dozens of ’em: Adrian Beltre stole one base – and exactly one base – for the eight straight season.
- And how about this absurdity:
“Ready for the fascinating box-score lines of Astros rookie Framber Valdez in his first two big-league starts? They’ll look slightly familiar.
Aug. 26: 5 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 3 K.
Aug. 31: 5 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 3 K.
We kid you not. He had exactly the same line in the first two starts of his career! Did you know there have been approximately 92,000 games started in the 2000s – by almost 1,600 different pitchers? And everyone not named Framber Valdez compiled as many 5-2-1-1-3-3 lines (two) as our man Framber unfurled just in the first two big-league starts he ever made.”
- This is art:
Miguel Andujar (NYY):
.297 27 HR 92 RBI (2019: $550K)
.297 37 HR 107 RBI (2019: $30M+)
Yankees would rather pay an extra $29,500,000.00 more a year for ten more home runs.
Who's the dummies?
— Terry Cushman (@cushmanMLB) January 2, 2019
- I still think the Yankees are going to sign Manny Machado, regardless of Miguel Andujar’s presence and the Troy Tulowitzki signing. Machado himself sent people into a tizzy by briefly following the YES Network on Instagram and then quickly unfollowing. (Even that, though, I wouldn’t take as a sign – he could simply want to follow them for mentions of himself, regardless of where he expects to sign.)
- Most people are expecting Machado to make a decision soon-ish, as his market wound up being somewhat limited – in the final stages – to only the Yankees, White Sox, and Phillies.
- Purdue superfan, Cubs fan, and – most importantly – the embodiment of a perfect message, Tyler Trent has passed away. Thank you to him and to his family that he shared so much with all of us in his time here:
Tyler Trent, the Purdue student who sparked hope amid tears in his journey with terminal cancer, has died https://t.co/oa8ZxsjmHQ
— IndyStar (@indystar) January 2, 2019