Having Trouble Sleeping? Try This Guided Meditation with Patrick Kane (No, Seriously)

Yes, you read that right, a guided meditation with Patrick Kane. Seems silly right?

Late on Monday night, on the eve of his 1,000th NHL game, Patrick Kane seemed to be having trouble falling asleep.

I can only imagine his bedtime routine consists of a warm glass of milk, or maybe a few episodes of The Office until he closes his eyes. But on this night, Kane decided to help himself, and the rest of us, with a guided meditation counting from 1 to 1,000.

No, seriously.

It’s just shy of a full hour and yes, it is mainly Patrick Kane counting softly from 1 to 1,000.

If anyone has done a guided meditation in any setting, this is spot on what you would expect. The soft toned music, the short statements, and the calm pacing. It’s all there.

Kane says in the video that this is his “Thank you” to you the fan for all the support you’ve shown him over the years. He also says, and I kid you not, “The moon is out. It’s glow time.”

He speaks for just under two minutes at the opening of the video and for the final 80 seconds. The other roughly 56 minutes is just him, counting from 1 to 1,000. Of course he adds a little extra on the numbers that end in 88. He also throws in a breathing exercise, talks about how he, too, can get stressed at work, encourages you with the wise words of Michael Scott, reminds you to focus on achieving your goals (of which he has scored 400), and about his 542nd game in which he didn’t record a point but didn’t let that deter him from going on to win the Stanley Cup.

He also gives us something we didn’t know we needed around number 863: Patrick Kane sings his own rendition of “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star,” just like he does for his newborn son when he has trouble sleeping. It is, quite honestly, the best thing.

He closes the video by saying, “Goodnight, Chicago. Sleep tight.”

Fantastic.

written by

Mario Tirabassi is a writer for Bleacher Nation. You can follow him on Twitter @Mario_Tirabassi.

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