I’m not trying to judge a book by its cover, but when the cover is just so very plain and nerdy, it’s pretty hard not to make some assumptions. Still. Shouldn’t do it. I own that.
This is St. Louis Cardinals manager Mike Shildt:
I have thought things about Mike Shildt. I have made assumptions. About his collection of hand-made steamboat replicas, for example. About his fondness for lightly-buttered crackers, perhaps. About his daily 5 a.m. appointment with a coffee, the newspaper, and then the toilet, in that order every day. These are assumptions I’ve made.
I’m sorry to have made them.
Shildt’s team just won their NLDS series – in extremely decisive fashion over the Atlanta Braves – and you can forgive anyone for being pumped in that situation. I just … I … I just really didn’t expect it to be like this (warning on the very, very naughty language):
“The [Braves] started some shit. We finished the shit. And that’s how we roll. No one fucks with us ever. Now, I don’t give a fuck who we play. We’re gonna fuck them up. We’re gonna take it right to them the whole fucking way. We’re gonna kick their fucking ass.” pic.twitter.com/2J7jyJc60O
— STLSportsCentral (@stlsportscntrl) October 10, 2019
EAR MUFFS, MISTER SHILDT’S CHILDREN!!!